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Basic Respect for Transsexuals

• Please use language that corresponds to my gender identity, even if my body does not seem to match, and even when talking about my past.
• If you are still adjusting to my transition, it is normal to make mistakes with pronouns. Don’t draw attention to it. Just correct yourself and carry on.
• A transsexual woman is a male-to-female. A transsexual man is a female-to-male. It is never the other way around. Though sometimes it is referred to as male-to-male, or female-to-female because individuals may not have ever identified as the opposite gender and don’t see it as a transition from one to the other, rather an alignment of body and mind.
• Don’t assume my gender identity defines my sexual orientation. Who I am attracted to is totally separate from my gender. If I am a transsexual man who likes men, treat me no differently than any other gay man. 
• Don’t expect me to conform to stereotypes of my gender. I wear clothes I like and I have a variety of interests, just like everyone else. There is no need to point out which of my behaviors are “boy actions” and “girl actions”.
• Please don’t use my old name or ask what it was. Instead of saying “back when you were _____” or “when you were a girl” say “before you came out as a man” or “prior to your transition”. 
• Don’t use my name in the 3rd person as if I was someone else, i.e. “Are you dressing as Jack now?”
• If you use the word transsexual (or trans), it’s better to use it as an adjective to describe a person, not as a noun, i.e. trans people, trans man, trans woman. 
• Don’t assume that I have chosen to be a transsexual person. The only choice I have made is whether or not to accept my situation and fix it to live a healthier life as I see fit.